Who even watches commercials anymore anyway?

Heinz made news this week when it pulled the above commercial for mayonnaise featuring...OMG!!! two men kissing! The company reportedly received a whopping 200 complaints after the spot aired. They pulled the ad and apologized to anyone who may have been offended.
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In a related story, another commercial recently spread online (this one actually legitimately offensive). It was for JC Penney and showed two teenagers rushing to get dressed after having sex:


Calm down everybody, Jamie Lynn Spears doesn't have her own teen maternity line at Penney's. The commercial was created by an advertising agency and submitted to the store, but JC Penney claims they never approved the ad and are "furious" over the attention it is bringing to the store--which hasn't gotten attention since...well, ever. Yeah, ok, whatever you say JC Penney.

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Here to comment, please welcome the Geico Caveman.

Welcome!

"What's up?"

So I'm interested to hear your take on all these controversial commercials, being in advertising yourself. Do you think commercials have gotten out of control, or are we just being too sensitive?

"You know I come from a time before television. Back then, it took a lot of time to get information on a product out because there were no commercials. We had to go door to door, you know? Like when I invented the wheel..."

Wait, wait, hold up, YOU invented the wheel? Like, you personally?

"Did I stutter?"

No, it's just that's pretty impressive, that's all. Hey, too bad there weren't patents back then huh? Ha!


"Oh ha ha, yeah, very funny. Do you even know how much that sucks? Now look at what I'm forced to do. I'm an advertising gag and the star of a failed sitcom. I INVENTED THE DAMN WHEEL! If it weren't for me, there wouldn't be any cars. There wouldn't be any car insurance. There wouldn't be any GEICO!! It's so disrespectful it makes me sick!"


"I don't mean to barge in, por favor, but Ay dios mio!!! Give it a rest Caveman!!!! At least you still got a job! I had to hump a lot of legs to get that Taco Bell gig! I gave them best years of my life and then they just threw me out like the leftover pintos and cheese. Speaking of which, thanks to that place, I had the runs for TWO WHOLE YEARS ese! That's 14 years for me! Oh yeah, I dropped the chulupa alright.

Oh, and now Taco Bell wants 50 Cent to change his name to 79 cent and he wants to sue them. Did it ever occur to them to ask me? Hell, I'd change my name in a Nueva York minute! So I don't wanna hear your bitching or about your dumb wheel invention, which you probably didn't even really invent, it's just that there's no one other cavemen alive to dispute it!"

".........................."

Caveman? Anything to add?

".........................."

Um, ok then. Thanks to the Geico Caveman and The Taco Bell Dog.

"I am not the Taco Bell Dog anymore! My name is Rick James. Yeah, like 'I'm Rick James bitch'! Don't get me started on that one either. "