February 2008

Thursday, February 28, 2008

Another day, another Idol scandal

Not much of a scandal, just a DUI, and an old one at that.

This year's token "rocker chick," Amanda Overmyer was arrested back in Octobert 2006 and plead guilty to DUI back in October 2006. She received a 60 day suspended sentence and was put on 180 days probation which ended last August.

What's shocking is she's had that same hair style since 2006!

Amanda has more to worry about than this coming out. Her performance last night was really, really, really bad.

SOURCE

Mariah looks............good!

Ok, until you get to the ridiculous stripper shoes but this is a big deal for her! Usually her ensembles consist of a short sausage dress three sizes too small for her.

Go Mariah!!

Just don't go too fast or you'll fall.

Ashlee and Pete are not downloading a baby

Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz have denied that Ashlee is pregnant following a parody video the couple made on the website friendsorenemies.com .

In the video, titled "World's Greatest Assholes" (my my, aren't we full of ourselves?) Pete talks about the illegal downloading of music problem and how he wants to make something that can't be illegally downloaded- A baby! Then the camera cuts to Ashlee lying on the bed eating Cheetos. ( I think they're reenacting the conception of Sean Preston Federline. ) Thankfully, the video ends there. Then they say the the release date is July 08. Get it? Those pranksters!

It was obviously a joke, but the couple want to make sure everyone knows that. Or they want to make sure everyone sees the video because they are really proud of the comic geniuses they are. Hey guys, next time: YouTube!

What is with all these celebrities making viral videos lately? Has anyone seen the Miley and Mandy show? (Disclaimer: Clicking on the Miley and Mandy link may cause maniacal rage and Asshat Hollywood is not responsible for any injuries or deaths that may result.) It used to be an outlet for nobodies like this guy to get their 15 minutes of fame. But the celebrities just won't let that be without getting in on it too.

SOURCE

Wednesday, February 27, 2008

Jennifer Love Hewitt Top Wallpaper 2008

Jennifer Love Hewitt Hot Black Wallpaper

Jennifer Love Hewitt Sexy Wallpaper

Jennifer Love Hewitt Crazy Wallpaper

New tattoo?

Stripper-turned Oscar winner Diablo Cody is planning to celebrate her Best Original Screenplay Academy Award by getting a tattoo of Juno star Ellen Page.

Asshat Hollywood ran into the screenwriter recently and asked about the impending ink. Diablo responded with "NOBODY ASKED ME! I would never consent to a lame publicity stunt at a time when I already want to hide. Jeebus!"

Ok then. Sorry?

SOURCE

I always think of Bjork around Oscartime, and here she is!

Bjork has been cancelled from appearing at a music festival in Serbia after allegedly making pro-Kosovan remarks at a concert in Japan.

Organizers of the Exit Festival, which will take place in Novi Sad, Serbia in July, dropped Bjork from the line-up after she dedicated a track called Declare Independence to the Balkan state of Kosovo (Serbia refuses to acknowledge Kosovo's independence after Kosovo recently broke away from Serbian rule. )

On her cancellation Bjork said, "Maybe a Serb attended my concert and called home, and therefore the concert in Novi Sad was cancelled."

Well they certainly didn't cancel her for her impeccable taste in clothing! Don't sweat it Bjork. It's just human behavior.

SOURCE

Mission Accomplished? How far you've come?

The Spice Girls concluded their reunion tour last night in Toronto, Canada after 47 shows. The tour was supposed to continue on to Australia, China and South Africa, but was cut short due to "personal reasons" (a.k.a. no one in Australia, China and South Africa gave two shits and they barely sold any tickets.)

The "Girls" posted a dramatic goodbye message to their fans on their official website:

Hello...

Our time is up... we've come to the end of the road… there are tears of both sadness and joy. Look how far we've come!

Who would have thought that our reunion could have turned out to be this amazing? It just shows what can grow out of an exciting thought, an idea, a hope, a dream. Yes, our reunion tour is proof that dreams do come true.

We have been lucky enough to have shared it with the most loyal fans in the world. Ten years on, you came back still wanting more… and it looks like we made some new friends along the way. You have inspired and ignited us with each show, the 47 that we performed, each time was amazing and it is thanks to you.

So we look to the future with hope and imagination and let Girl Power live on through all of you as it will continue in us and the future generations to come.

We have learnt so much through you and through each other.

"Never give up on the good times always believe in the love you find."

We hate goodbyes but sadly the time has come to take our final bow so maybe our song says it best:

"Goodbye my friend, it's not the end… So glad we made it, time will never ever change it… "

Mission Accomplished...

Love

Emma, Geri, Mel B, Melanie C and Victoria
xxxxx

So deep!! Though I think the lyrics that say it best are:
"I won't be hasty, I'll give you a try,
If you really bug me then I'll say goodbye."

Until the period pictures come out again....

Star is reporting that Adnan Ghalib has been telling friends that Britney's pregnant with his child. They even go as far as to reach that Brit shows a baby bump in the above photo.

One of Adnan's "friends" told the magazine, "Britney is Adnan's dream come true. He knows that if he has a child with Brit, he'll be made for life."

Aww, true love! She's his dream come true!

I believe the children are the future...and they are doomed if this guy's their mentor

Bobby Brown has avoid jail time and received community service for his December 07 arrest for cocaine possession in Massachusetts.

The judge has recommended BobbAY work as a mentor to young people for one year to fulfill his volunteer work and his attorney agreed. If he doesn't screw up, the whole incident will be wiped from his record.

What the hell is this guy going to be able to mentor children in? Screwing up their lives? Shaving their fades to look like Gumby? Digging out doody bubbles? Seriously, what is wrong with that judge? Is there no trash on the highway to pick up?

SOURCE

Stupid Pregnant Jessica Alba Quote of the Day

"Instead of hitting up the Governor's Ball or any other party, we opted for sweats and In-N-Out Burgers. Being preggers kind of takes the fun out of partying until the wee hours." - Jessica Alba on what she did after the Oscars.

You don't say!

SOURCE

Yes you are!

But if they fix her eye, what's Larry gonna have left to sell-out?

In case you haven't been keeping up on Entertainment Tonight lately, Larry Birkhead has been pimping out 1-year old Dannielynn's crossed eye for the past couple months--it's usually right after the daily segment on Temptress and her even more morbidly obese mother going shopping or going to a restaurant or getting makeovers with the Anorexic Twins.

So back to Dannielynn... She had the surgery to correct her eye (medical term is stabismus) and is home and resting comfortably.

That is until Entertainment Tonight comes over and shoves a camera in her face.

SOURCE

Tuesday, February 26, 2008

20 MILLION DOLLARS??!!!

Boxer Floyd Mayweather Jr. will reportedly receive $20 Million Dollars to fight Big Show at Wrestlemania 24 on March 30th!!

Damn, for 20 Mil, I'd have a 3-way with Snitsky and Hornswoggle!! Ok, maybe I'd do it for $50.

He apparently has no problem sharing the wealth. Check out the video from yesterday's Wrestlemania press conference. He looks legitimately pissed when the crowd starts chanting "De La Hoya!"

SOURCE

Wanna look like Amy Winehouse?

Amy Winehouse is considering launching a clothing and cosmetics line modeled after her own personal style!

A "friend" of Amy's told The Sun, "She wants to bring out a range of cosmetics and fashion products. There could be hairspray, head scarves, liquid eyeliner, perfume."

There has to be ballet slippers too!

Hopefully this trend will take off like Madonna fever did back in the 80's! Although, if it does, the ozone is doomed!

SOURCE

In more gay American Idol news...

For no apparent reason, Paula Abdul has spoken out about gay rumors surrounding Simon Cowell.

She told Britain's Star magazine, "People say that all the time but no, he's not! His brother always jokes and says that he's gay but Simon has fun with it now. He's very comfortable in his skin."

I don't know what to do with this and frankly I'm bored with the whole thing so insert your own joke about A) Simon and Seacrest, B) Paula is drunk, C) Paula is high, D) Paula's video, E) Hey Paula!, F) skin, G) being comfortable, H) Clay Aiken

SOURCE

Another day, another Idol scandal

Vote For the Worst has posted the following photos of American Idol finalist, David Hernandez , and claims that he was formerly a stripper at a place called Dick's Cabaret in Phoenix.

While there are no photos of David actually stripping, there are some which show him working at a gay nightclub called Burn which recently closed.

These photos came to light after rumors were posted of David having a....(gasp!!)..BOYFRIEND of 2-3 years!! He's gay???!! SHOCKING!!

For real, what is the big hairy, or rather, shaved, deal here? So fucking what if he was a stripper and worked in a gay club? Will people not vote for him because of it?

The answer is no, people won't vote for him anyway because American Idol is too busy pimping out that Australian guy and the ex-boyband faux-rocker and Danny Noriega will continue in his quest to become the next Sanjaya and David will get lost in the shuffle.

But at least now he gets to blame it on the homophobes that turned on Clay Aiken.

Next stop: Harvard!

Jamie Lynn Spears has received her Good Enough Diploma!!! PEOPLE reports that Jamie passed her high school equivalency exam about a month ago and is even now looking to take the ACT college entrance test.

A friend said, "She's already got her diploma. She wants to take her ACT. She's not wasting any time. People don't know her. When she gets something in her head, she'll make it happen. Everybody is so supportive of her."

Congrats Jamie Lynn, y'all learnded real good!

Monday, February 25, 2008

Jimmy's response

Juno who the fuck you're talking to Stuart?

Oscar-winner Juno writer (Yabba Dabba) Diablo Cody gave a big F-U to shoe designer Stuart Weitzman last night by NOT wearing those fugly shoes worth 1 MILLION!! dollars to the Academy Awards. She blogged about feeling used to pimp them out on her Myspace page on Friday:

Million-dollar WHAT?
Current mood: Agitee

Yesterday, my stylist took me to go try on my Oscar shoes, which were made for me by Stuart Weitzman. They were sparkly. Kind of retro. With hefty brooches to be affixed atop each narrow toebox. I was pleased, but it wasn't, like, an event.

Today, I read this. NEWS TO ME, kids. I must have somehow missed the part where my shoes cost a MILLION FUCKING DOLLARS and my "choice" of footwear would be publicized nationwide. I honestly thought they were just sparkly shoes. Mr. Weitzman did mention that the diamonds were real when I tried them on, but I'm not Nancy Rockman, Expert Gemologist. I didn't, you know, bust out my miniature spyglass and assess the potential worth of my kicks.

I swear to God, I have the most bizarre life. Truly.

This looks really attention-whorey, and for once, I didn't do it on purpose.

I'm flattered that they picked me (surprise!) to wear the Pimp Shooz, but WTF, right?

ETA: I'm actually really pissed about this, now that I think about it. They're using me to publicize their stupid shoes and NOBODY ASKED ME. I would never consent to a lame publicity stunt at a time when I already want to hide. I'm sorry if I sound like a party-pooper, but Jeebus.

Asshats of the Week

Anyone that watched the Oscars last night may have noticed that during the "In Memoriam" montage, Brad Renfro was not mentioned.

TMZ called the Academy out on the omission, and this was their lame ass response: "It is simply not possible to include everyone in that segment."

I told you it was lame ass. So we're supposed to believe that they didn't have enough time. The close to FOUR hour long Academy Awards didn't have two seconds to spare for an actor that made 26 movies in his very short life.

But they had enough time for the gag about the history of binoculars in film.

Proof that collagen is bad for your brain

Poor Joan Rivers.

First Lisa Rinna steals her red carpet gig on the TV Guide Channel, now she's also stolen her not knowing shit shtick.

Friday, February 22, 2008

What the hell happend to Nicole Kidman's face?

I will never understand why these dumbasses think troutlips are a good idea.

What the hell happened to Lil' Kim's face?

Discuss amongst yourselves.

"Springtime For Castro" anyone?

There are some people who you can never tell if they are joking or not. Michael Moore is one of them. You think he's joking, but you never really know for certain.

He's gotten himself in the news this week after declaring that he has invited retired Cuban president, Fidel Castro, to the Oscars on Sunday. Moore's recent documentary, Sicko, featured a segment on Cuba's universal health care system.

Moore issued the following press release, "I got some great news today because I was trying to figure out how I was going to get Castro into the Oscars and for me he resigns today so he can come to L.A. and go as my guest and perhaps give the acceptance speech. As long as he keeps it under five hours. I'm telling you, that's got to be a ratings grabber. Can you imagine him? Showing up? If I could talk to (Oscar producer) Gil Cates and maybe get Castro in a dance number at the beginning of the show? Great."

SOURCE

Sexiest Woman???

Heather Mills is reportedly hobbling her way up to the top of FHM's (For Horny Males) annual "Sexiest Woman" poll.

Heather has been receiving an average of 1,000 votes a day, compared with previously receiving around 15. She is currently in 95th place, ahead of Paris Hilton (ok, I'll give her that one), Gwen Stefani (huh?) and Kirsten Dunst (eh?).

FHM deputy editor Chris Bell said, “Heather Mills has always been vilified as a gold-digger with a dubious past. But with her pin-sharp power suits and model good-looks, thousands of FHM readers have realised she’s about to become the world’s most eligible – and richest – single woman.” I know, I know: "model good looks"--this guy should do stand-up!

It's gotta be the divorce settlement money. That and the kink factor due to the stub--maybe they saw that Nip/Tuck episode.

Or it's a computer glitch and they are trying to vote for the Unsexiest Woman poll.

Vote For the Worst should embrace this, it's much more intriguing than Idol at the moment.

In the lead are some chick named Cheryl Cole and last year's winner Jessica "I'm Too Sexy"Alba. The winner will be announced on April 24.

SOURCE

Saving the world and repopulating it at the same time has taken its toll

Life & Style Weekly has reported that Saint Angelina, who is rumored to be pregnant with twins, collapsed on her flight home from Iraq two weeks ago.

The story claims that Angelina fainted in her seat and was given oxygen and treated for nosebleeds and leg cramps.

Because of early-pregnancy complications with Shiloh, Brad and Angie have moved a full-time nurse into their home as a precaution. The only problem with that is that Angelina is never home and always in some third world country!!

I will say a prayer to Saint... oh wait, I usually pray to Saint Angelina. Shit! What am I going to do now?

SOURCE

This is a photo of:

A. Jada, Will, Tom, and Katie at the First Annual Essence Black Women in Hollywood Luncheon last night.

B. Jada, Will, Tom, and Katie having the unlimited soup, salad, and breadsticks lunch special at The Olive Garden.

C. Jada,Will, Tom, and Katie preparing to EAT YOUR SOUL!!!!!

PIC

Well, she told ya she was trouble

If Amy Winehouse's recent sobriety was for real, it unfortunately seems to have been short-lived, after Amy trashed a hotel room in London's Riverbank Plaza Hotel causing $6.000.00 worth of damage.

Amy was staying in a suite at the luxury hotel since leaving rehab earlier this month. During her two-week stay, she has refused to allow the cleaning crew into the room. When Amy was out attending the Brit Awards Wednesday night, the hotel management team were finally able to gain access to the room.

Once inside the suite, they found the floor littered with empty champagne bottles, cigarette butts and ashes all over the carpet, and spilled drinks which ruined the wooden floors in the hallway. The bathtub was stained with black hair dye.

A source told Britain's The Sun, "It was covered in booze and fag butts, absolutely disgusting. …Most of the room had been used as an ashtray… the place smelt incredibly stale.
The bath had to be scrubbed and unblocked from balls of matted hair. It took three maids two hours to get it in a habitable order."

SOURCE

Got Weed?

Aww, all the younger siblings of Hollywood asshats are coming of age. First Jamie Lynn gets knocked up, then Paris's little brother got arrested for DUI, now little Aaron Carter has been busted for pot.

The youngest of the Douchebag Carter brothers was pulled over for speeding in Kimble County, Texas early this morning. When the cops searched his car, they found two ounces of marijuana. Aaron was then arrested and is currently being held in jail until tomorrow when he will be arraigned.

(sniffle) They grow up so fast!

SOURCE

The little boy who cried wolf

Demi Moore, Madonna, Bruce Willis, Gwyneth Paltrow, and Salma Hayak are among the guests that are being urged to get a Hepatitis A vaccination after attending Ashton Kutcher's 30th birthday party at New York bar Socialista on February 7th because one of the bartenders that worked the party was infected.

New York City Deparment of Health and Mental Hygiene medical epidemiologist, Dr. Sharon Batler said "We are asking these bar patrons to get this vaccination as a precautionary measure."

Most of the warned guests seemed to laugh off the threat of disease. They were all like You're not gonna get me this time Ashton! Madonna took some extra precaution though, doubling up on her Kabballah water intake.

SOURCE

J-Lo Popped!

Jennifer Lopez finally gave birth to her twins early this morning in Long Island, NY. She had a girl and a boy. The girl came first at 12:12 a.m. and weighed 5lbs, 7oz. The boy was born at 12:23 a.m. and weighed 6 lbs.

Jennifer's manager released the following statement to PEOPLE, "Jennifer and Marc are delighted, thrilled and over the moon." Poor J-Lo, it always has to be about her ass!

Expect to see photos of the babies once the couple is able to finalize negotiations with the highest bidder and the sale price is reportedly up to 6 million dollars! Wow!! Who needs to make records when you can just make babies! Once that deal is secured, they will release the names of the babies. Right now the going rate is around 2 million dollars. For each name.

Congrats to the delighted new parents. Hopefully they got Jen's looks.

Paula's Video!

In case you missed the premiere of Paula Abdul's new video "Dance Like There's No Tomorrow" last night on American Idol, here it is.

It's actually not terrible. It's no "Opposites Attract", but it's definitely better than "Promise of a New Day".

Randy Jackson looks really cheesy playing bass (yes, I KNOW he played in Journey)and the end shot of the cardboard cutouts of Simon, Randy, and Ryan is even sillier. I'm surprised there weren't any product placed Coke cups! They probably didn't trust Paula with them.

All in all though, it's a flashback to the Paula that we grew up with, except the voice is a bit more computerized this time.